Smokey and the Bandit Part 3 (1983)

There's absolutely nothing redeeming about this embarrassment of a sequel. No Bandit equals no fun. Why they thought they could make a Bandit sequel without the Bandit is a mystery for the ages. While it does have Jerry Reed and stars Jackie Gleason, it just isn't fun at all. Colleen Camp is a poor substitute for spunky and charming Sally Field.

The plot is about Buford T. Justice (the villain in the prior films, now the protagonist) transporting a large stuffed fish from Florida to Texas. I feel stupider for just having typed that. I can't believe someone thought this sounded like a good idea. Apparently the original idea was to have Gleason play two roles, Buford and a new Bandit character. Test audiences hated it so much they re-shot the "Bandit" scenes with Jerry Reed's character Snowman. The original idea sounds equally terrible, if not more so. It seems there was never any chance Smokey 3 would have been anything but god-awful.

Fmovies: This absolutely sucked...and I'm still wondering how in the world it got a PG rating. The first Smokey was great, and the second one was still pretty good...better than most sequels anyway. I thought that Smokey 3 would be a fun movie simply because of the first two. I am also very pleased to know that Burt Reynolds had no part in this film; if he did, I would be ashamed. What really got me though was all the nudity and sexuality. It was completely ridiculous and could have been completely taken out of the movie, and you wouldn't have missed a thing. Unfortunately, it appears that Smokey and the Bandit too had become subject to the raunchy sexuality of the times. It truly was a waste of my time, and I wish it had never been made.

There have been lots of dumb and unnecessary sequels throughout the history of Hollywood, but "Smokey and the Bandit Part 3" was sure a doozy. Really, a second "Bandit" movie was too much, but at least the sequel had the entire cast back and was funny at times. Neither can be said about this film.

Like with most bad movies, the whole central thesis of this film is wrong. Here, the crime is screwing around with story continuity. Sheriff Buford T. Justice (Jackie Gleason) is entertaining as a foil for the Bandit, but making him the main character is just insane.

The "plot" to this little travesty is that Justice and his simpleminded son Junior (Mike Henry) must transport a plastic shark cross country that's going to be the mascot for Big and Little Enis Burdett's new fast food franchise in exchange for $250,000. However, the Enises intend to make his life miserable by impeding his progress at every turn, and even enlist the help of Cletus "The Snowman" Snow (Jerry Reed) to impersonate the Bandit and try to steal the fish away.

Along the way, Justice acquires a big, ugly female admirer, gets involved in motor hijinks, and tries to steal back the fish from Cletus and Dusty Trails (Colleen Camp), a former used car salesman who hooks up with the faux Bandit for no discernible reason other than it's in the script.

All right, at this point you're going "WTF?" and rightly so. This whole film is a mess. How can a movie filled with stunts and action scenes be so boring? Very, very easily. Just put together filmmakers with no talent or vision, give them a script that's hackneyed at best, and let 'er rip!

The movie is filled with stupid and pointless scenes. A long sequence feature Ku Klux Klan members attacking two black truck drivers is tasteless and poorly realized, and is indicative of the movie's general theme -- crude sequences thrown together with little rhyme or reason.

The only part of the movie that made me laugh was a brief sequence where Buford and Junior Justice are in a hotel room filled with sexual deviants, and each time they open door Buford comments on the situation. "Looks like a union meeting," he mentions, followed by "Get away from that or you'll get the herpes!" which are both just as stupid as anything else in this movie. An opening sequence spoofing "Patton" made me crack a smile, but that was all.

Reed is simply awful in the role of the Bandit, and plays the role like a third grader who got the part of a lifetime and can't stop gleaming. Maybe someone should have told him that being proxy to a legend isn't a compliment.

And of course, the big question is: WHERE IS BURT REYNOLDS? The answer? AS FAR AWAY FROM THIS MOVIE AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE! Heck, compared to this, "Cannonball Run 2" is a masterpiece. And yes, it did hurt to say that.

Gleason should have known better, but still, any moment he's on screen is a welcome relief in this turkey. His Southern-baked comments are old hat but this time, but at least they remind of you of a time when his character was actually entertaining. And he sure beats the endless amount of screen time eaten up by Paul Williams and Pat McCormick extra corny dialogue as the Enises. They're just bad. Really bad.

In the only inspired moment of the movie, Reynolds shows up in a brief cameo dream sequence near the end, almost like a bone being tossed to the audiences who stuck

Smokey and the Bandit Part 3 fmovies. Call me weird, but I love bad movies. I just get a kick out of seeing what a couple of million dollars really means to Hollywood. In this case, it doesn't mean much. Smokey 3 is one of the biggest stinkers ever produced by a major studio. Besides asking the obvious questions that this movie poses (Why would "The Great One" actually star in this disaster and how could Universal create, release, and advertise this movie and still be able to sleep at night?), you have got to wonder one thing...where in the heck did all of these ramps come from? One example (out of too many to count) is how Jerry Reed (Snowman posing as Bandit) actually jumps his Firebird out of his garage...from a dead stop...huh?? The plot is putrid, the supporting cast is horrible (Jerry Reed used to be lovably annoying as Snowman...all he can do here is utter obnoxious one-liners and triple-speak while hooting and hollering about getting to pretend to be Burt Reynolds), and there is actually a point during all this mess when the pity for Gleason lifts, and you actually want something to fall from the sky onto Buford T. Justice and end it all. But watch this movie...I beg you...this is the worst bad movie ever made, and it is worth the rental money to spend 1 and 1/2 hours being embarrassed for the families and friends of everyone who had a hand in this disaster.

Smokey and the Bandit (part one, that is) was a really funny movie with a great Burt Reynolds. But this time around, almost everything goes wrong. Almost...

Because there is this one scene at the beginning of the movie as Jackie Gleason spoofs 'Patton', and I loved that part (as I love Patton), but that's about all the joy this movie gave me...

Cledus 'the snowman' is the bandit in this one, as Burt Reynolds turned it down (and rightfully so), but he's so awful it's hard to describe. If he'd said 'I am the bandit, I am the bandit' one more time I would've slapped him in the face.

As everybody deserves a good slapping after making this one. One question left: What were they thinking?

2/10.

Deary me. Where do I begin? I usually have no problem watching stupid films. They give you an opportunity to just sit back, relax and enjoy the fun. Except when they are so bad that no matter how hard you try to enjoy it, you still wish there was a noose that you could use to end the misery of it all. The dialogue in this film was unbelievable. Anyone who found it funny is in urgent need of a funnybone transplant. The car chase scenes are endless, and very very lame. I don't think there is much more to say except that this film should be avoided at all costs. It is an insult to humanity, and if I were one of the actors i would quickly immigrate to the north pole and wear a sack over my head in complete and utter shame.