It's Pat: The Movie (1994)

My wife and I play a game while we go on long road trips. It's called "Name the bad Saturday NIGHT LIVE alumnus film". It's a wonderful game--and far longer than the alternative "Name the good Saturday NIGHT LIVE alumnus film"--as there are practically a bazillion films made by ex-SNL actors which are absolutely wretched. Yet, compared to "It's Pat", even horrible films like "Dr. Detroit", "Neighbors" and "Best Defense" look like Oscar-contenders! Yes, this is my nomination for the absolute WORST of the lot (though I have yet to see "Night at the Roxbury" and "Superstar"). Apparently, I am not alone with this--as currently "It's Pat" is ranked #95 on IMDb's infamous Bottom 100 list.

The biggest problem with "It's Pat" is that the Pat sketches on "SNL" were completely unfunny and annoying. But, like too many of the show's skits, they repeated the stupid thing again and again and again. Think about it...THE joke is that Pat's gender is uncertain. Wow...shallow AND offensive...but also completely unfunny. And, with this movie, a five minute bit on "SNL" is stretched out to full-length movie format! While this problem is more than enough, the film also suffers from bad acting (Ms. Sweeney's characterization is dreadful and the epitome of the expression 'one-note'), bad writing, too much crudity and an offensive storyline. After all, jokes about what's inside Pat's pants abound and become tiresome and gross...and that's only three minutes into the film! After a while, it was so oppressively awful that I had to turn it off (my daughter kept threatening to do bodily harm to me if I didn't). Wretched, unfunny and 100% misguided--who in the world thought this abomination would be worth making in the first place?! I think cancer is funnier (and I've had cancer--so I know what I am talking about)!

Fmovies: Just do not see this, not even to find out how bad it is, this movie is terrible, its annoying, its irritable, its the movie version of chicken pox. DO NOT WATCH THIS, it will taint your love for movies and take away a slice of your life you will never get back. THIS SUCKS!!!!!

Mercy what an awful excuse for a film. Sexless (meaning impossible to tell whether male or female) Pat (Julia Sweeney) wants to get married to another equally sexless person in this amazingly poor motion picture that was just a ploy by those morons at Saturday Night Live to make a few quick bucks. They made very few bucks as the movie-going public saw through this mess before they ever set foot into a theater. Tasteless and worthless. Turkey (0 stars out of 5).

It's Pat: The Movie fmovies. They probably should not have made a feature length film of the "Pat" sketch. They probably should not have even made it a running gag on Saturday Night Live. It should, however, probably be ranked higher on IMDb than Carrot Top's Chairman of the Board. Julia Sweeney is kind of annoying, but Dave Foley is great. What REALLY makes the movie is Charles Rocket's spiral into dementia over the enigma of Pat. That whole bit has me rolling on the floor. And also - Pat plays tuba with Ween! The karaoke scene is hilarious too. This movie is not a 10, but it's definitely not in the bottom 100 of all time. I liked this movie enough to buy it, but I gave it a 5 for a lame premise saved by the co-stars (Foley, Rocket, and Kathy Griffin).

What starts off as a promising comedy quickly turns into mindless dribble quicker than you can say "Chalupa". The problem is that Pat can't carry a movie. If Pat had been in a very small supporting role in a movie, that would be barable, but this is just one of the most agonizing films ever. Even though there are many scenes that let Dave Foley bring out his cross-dressing best, they don't really point into any direction. The plot? Well, it's just a 5 minute Pat sketch stretched out to be 77 agonizing minutes. The movie relies on spit jokes and gender benders to carry the film. Not good. Luckily, SNL (The best show on TV) rebounded with the classics Stuart Saves His Family and Night at the Roxbury.

I WANTED to like this movie, REALLY I did. Dave Foley, Ween, Julia Sweeney......but I have to say it is BAD. A lesson should've been learned long ago that SNL skits are 5 minutes for a reason. There is really no way to pad em out to feature films: except for Waynes World,which I liked. I dont know whose dumber: the people who keep makin these movies or us dumbies who keep renting em.