College (2008)

I can't believe I sat through this atrocious movie at the cinema. What was I thinking? I'm still regretting the decision to take the time out to see this load of garbage at the CINEMA of all places.

The whole movie is just a recycled plot of comedies such as American Pie, Animal House, Van Wilder, Superbad and Old School.

Maybe the first 15 minutes were slightly funny. The rest of the movie was just disgusting. The jokes and one liners were embarrassingly unfunny, and most of the scenes made me want to lose my appetite. Won't describe them to you, but believe me - it is really disgusting. Most of the comedy would not look out of place in a restricted pornographic movie. I'm cringing thinking about it right now.

I'm sorry I wasted $10 on a ticket for this. I can't believe I saw this at the cinema. Gee....I should have come at another time and saw some other decent movie at the cinema.

That had to be the worst movie I've had the misfortune of watching in 2008. I'm surprised this was not sent directly to DVD.

Overall: Atrocious and disgusting movie that is not even funny. You'll be regretting it if you watch this.

1/10.

Fmovies: When I first saw previews, TV spots, advertising's, etc. for college I thought that they were just over hyping another overrated movie. I thought that College would be a decent comedy for late August, but still I did not expect it to be such a comedy classic as the previews proclaimed. The TV spots tried to put this movie into the category of such classics like Animal House, Revenge of the Nerds and American Pie, which it is by-far none of those at all. I went to see this with some friends thinking that this would be a decent time filler before we went to a bar later in the night, boy were we wrong. This movie sucked from start to finish. The college realisticness is truly unbelievable and the characters get on your nerves. Drake Bell should go back to his Teen Choice award crap and stay out of the Rated R comedy genre for a while, because they pushed him into a Rated R party movie way toooooooo fast and he wasn't good at it. The fat kid tries so hard to be funny that he really gets on your last nerve. That is all this is, a bunch of drunk partying that has already been done before and lame jokes that could have been thought of by preschool students. So don't waste your time with this and watch Superbad, Dazed and Confused, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Animal House or anything that is actually a good party movie.

1/10

This movie is pathetic. Awful. Just awful. Really bloody awful. The jokes -- if there even are any, it's hard to tell -- are painfully unfunny. They all fall flat. They are also all of the "poop", "fart" and "getting laid" variety which we've all seen done to death lately (and done much better) in other movies about us young people. Whoever made this movie should be jailed for the rest of their life just to make sure they can't possibly even accidentally wander onto a movie set again. That is how awful this movie is. I almost vomited. Somehow this movie gave me some kind of a flu. Everyone involved with this movie should be banned from movie work for the rest of their lives. Horrible acting, horrible writing, a horrible script all the way around. Not funny at all.

College fmovies. What you get with 'College' is, a lamely executed farce of a comedy that relies on idiotic humor that not even idiots would find funny. Luckily, the film has more boobs in it than any film of recent memory, and a couple of the female characters are extraordinarily good looking. That means, of course, that if you're either gay or female, you're going to want to kill yourself from boredom.

A simplistic plot for a simplistic movie doesn't allow for a lot of surprises, though the film's ending does get points for departing from the formulaic 'boy has epiphany and gets girl' ending, and adding a little more to it. Our three leads are tolerable at best. 'College' boasts a mostly unknown cast, with the only 'names' in the film being Drake Bell, Kevin Covais, and Verne Troyer. Andrew Caldwell's performance as a wannabe partier is basically a teenage version of Chris Farley's entire career. Except this one doesn't have the laughs. Bell is alright, but fails to gain the audience's attention as the leading man so many tween fans already tout him as. Kevin 'Chicken Little' Covais has a few funny moments, especially whenever he's acting drunk, but adds little to the film. He's a MUCH better singer than actor, as evidenced by American Idol. Haley Bennett was my favorite part of the film as Bell's love interest. Gary Owen is hilarious as 'Bearcat', the typical crazy frat guy.

'College' has heart, and gets credit for trying, but the execution on the part of the director, casting directors, producers, and to a lesser extent, the screenwriters is what hurts the film. First, I like that Drake Bell is trying to shed his Nickelodeon image, but he was the wrong guy to cast here, mostly because he isn't a big enough name to draw in the people, and what little fans he does have aren't old enough to see this film...there lies the problem. Bell's fans can't see the movie, and I seriously doubt all the people that voted for Covais on American Idol are fond enough to waste their money on this movie. Next, the rating of this film, while very much deserved, hurts the film the most. Had the film been made as a PG-13 film, it might have been just as 'good' in terms of quality, not to mention it would have made more money. Third, all the 'f' bombs and nudity were completely unnecessary, and seem to be there just to secure the R rating. Fourth, having been to college myself, this film is nothing like the real thing. The parties are crazy, but this is too much. It is so unrealistic on every level that it's just astounding. At least Superbad was realistic...in some regards.

'College' is a painful and sad attempt to recreate college life on the big screen. If you want something more realistic, try 'Fifty Pills'. Or just take fifty pills of something. Bell is seriously miscast, and Deb Hagan's direction, along with her producers' bad choices, drag down what could have been a mildly entertaining and mildly successful Superbad ripoff.

If you go into college expecting the bare minimum of a movie and taking it for what it is (a mildly entertaining cliché filled coming of age comedy) you will still not enjoy yourself. The reason is simple, it tries too hard to be funny. It's most easily compared to that annoying guy at work who stands at the water cooler making immature mom jokes or an annoying teacher at school who desperately wants to impress the students. The script surprisingly isn't bad but this movie rips off of Superbad so much with the character of Fogel in relation to this movies Morris you could call it plagiarism. The ever so ridiculously cliché character that brings sympathy and laughs from the audience because of how naive he is always being so sexually insecure and inexperienced is just so old. The only actor who deserves any sort of a nod is Drake Bell for his mediocre acting and decent carrying of his co actors (Andrew Caldwell and Kevin Covais.) It's sad watching this movie really because the actors so desperately want to be funny (except Drake Bell) so that they can get recognition and be cast into an Apatow film. They have a chance really with the script and extremely humorous atmosphere filled with jocks and egotistical lunatics both male and female. They're acting coaches and idiotic attitudes hurt them here as they failed to make a humorous movie. You average group of teenagers may enjoy this, which is not a bad thing but if you go into this movie looking for a cohesive story line and enjoyable plot then go watch Tropic Thunder where the actors actually succeed in some of these categories.

Oh thats right, I have.

Lets see. Animal House, Revenge of the Nerds, Van Wilder, American Pie, Beta House, Accepted... ETC. ETC. ETC.

Whats the difference between those movies and "College?" The others managed to come up with more creative titles. Oh, and "Animal House" had John Belushi.

Seriously, if you've seen any of the above movies, then you've seen "College." The original ideas in "College" are so few and far between that you'll have to wonder if the creators of "College" actually bothered to write a script, or rather spun a wheel of clichés and inserted them in the appropriate spots. "College" once again tries to tell you what life on a University campus is 'supposed' to be like, and fails pretty horribly. You begin to wonder if the 'College' students in "College" are actually paying attendants of Fieldmont University (F.U! Get it? hah...no.) or they just happen to squat in the decrepit house near the campus. Apparently they don't attend classes, don't even OWN textbooks, and believe a GPA is a "Great Party Area" rated on a 0-4 scale.

Long story short, "College," while it claims it has something different than those other "College" films, is NOTHING you haven't seen done much better before. I hope it drowns out in its own filth and causes several film companies to go bankrupt, thus ensuring they'll never spit out cookie cutter crud like this.

Drake Bell and Co. deserve MUCH, MUCH better. They do well, but given a better script I would have been more impressed. I'd give it a 1 1/2 just because of their performances, but it won't let me so hey, their loss.

PLEASE, avoid it. You'll thank me later. And tell your friends to avoid it. Thats the only way to stop the cancerous spread