Chairman of the Board (1998)

Masterpiece. Carrot Top blows the screen away. Never has one movie captured the essence of the human spirit quite like "Chairman of the Board." 10/10... don't miss this instant classic.

Fmovies: Yes, the votes are in. This film may very well be the Plan 9 From Outer Space for our generation. But whereas Ed Wood's film, for all its flaws, retains a certain charm despite it all, this film defines the word "charmless" to the nth degree. In fact, I'd suggest to the editors of the Oxford English Dictionary to cite this movie as a key example defining the that word in the next update to the dictionary.

Carrot Top is a performer of such abysmal ability that normally rational people that I know once they hear his name become homicidal maniacs dedicated to wanting to kill Mr. Top as soon as possible. Indeed, if one goes to Amazon.com and look at customer reviews for Carrot Top's movie and other performance DVD, one will find several that could be construed as death threats to Mr. Top.

One other curious fact about this film, I recall that Mike Nelson, the head writer for MST 3000, in his book Mike's Mega Cheese about movies, good and bad, said he saw this film and shortly afterwords couldn't recall a thing about it, including the title. Obviously Mike was suffering a classic reaction to trauma. Viewing this atrocity was so soul numbing, Mike Nelson had to block it from his mind. (Evidently, in a later chapter in his book, Mike Nelson had recovered his memeory of this film. From the review he offers, Mike Nelson was definitely not grateful for the recovered memory.)

The only comment I offer about the film, and it is not a spoiler, it's simply God's honest truth, it's not funny. None of it is, not even a nanosecond of it is funny.

"Chairman of the Board" is a ridiculously stupid film from the popular comic Carrot Top (also seen on the 1-800-COLLECT commercials). He plays a surfing inventor who comes upon a man who has a flat tire. Top helps him out and a few days later discovers the guy's died and has given his company to the comedian. Even if someone else was in Carrot Top's role, it still would have been bad. The jokes (which are constantly rigged throughout) are terrible and the idea of a romantic "plot twist" should have been discarded. DO NOT WATCH!!!

Chairman of the Board fmovies. The only interesting thing about this movie is that almost everyone who has a speaking role was in an episode of Seinfeld. The plot is that he needs to get the rent money and then they just forget that. He's an inventor who inherits a multi-million dollar manufacturing company and never thinks to make any of his great inventions. Just like in every "comedy", there's the completely useless love story that does nothing but add 20 minutes to an already unbearable movie. This movie is somehow less funny than Carrot Top's stand up comedy which is a miracle. If you want to try to remember all the bit characters from Seinfeld, this could be watchable. If you want to be entertained, run away.

The humor is non-existent in this loser of a movie. Carrot Top plays a surfer dude inventor who consistently blows the rent money on his goofy, useless inventions. Then he helps an old guy broken down by the side of the road, and voila, he's inherited a major corporation. And on and on and on past the jealous relatives, humanizing the corporation, hostile takeovers, the obligatory love interest.. aargh...let's just say this movie is virtually unwatchable. What Carrot Top has accomplished is to convince me never to go to his stage shows.

This movie is stupid. There's no getting around it. But so is Dumb and Dumber. Mind you, Dumb and Dumber is significantly more funny than this. However, I for one love seeing stupid movies (Tail Sting) and laughing with a group of good friends over how bad it is. Call me callous, but see this movie, and you'll find that the only way you can laugh at it is if you laugh at it instead of with it.