Hatchet II (2010)

After all the hullabaloo in the media about Hatchet 2 not getting a cinema release – much of it from the director himself – I had envisioned writing this up as an overlooked minor classic, instead I had to watch the last 20 minutes twice to prove to myself I didn't miss anything and that the film really was meant to end that way.

In reality I should have seen it coming, the original Hatchet received much undue praise when in reality it was a straight 80s rip, that's not necessarily a bad thing, but it was a rip of generic 80s crap, not the cream of the crop. The so-called "anti-hero" Victor Crowley was also massively overrated: Gee a mutated freakishly strong psychopath that lives in a swamp and kills anyone unsuspecting who shows up in gory waysÂ… ...That's original.

In retrospect it was also a really bad sign that the director decided Loreal style that "he was worth it", and plonked his name on the title: so I should kowtow and refer to this as "Adam Green's Hatchet 2".

Anyhoo in H2 (that's what I call it, but I'm just creative like that) we get a clumsy backstory that in essence shows that Victor was "born of awkward circumstances".

I've said it before – if you don't have a creative backstory don't tell it – just get to the killin' and the screamin'.

The remainder of the film revolves around the bizarre premise that Victor is somehow an undead ghost or something, and that only his avenging himself will rid himself from the swamps and save people from himself.

Made no sense to me either, which wouldn't have mattered a zack if I liked how he went about itÂ… The movie at least then tries to adhere to the tried and tested formula of heavy metal, gore & tits, but the formula is so formulaic and basically boring that it had exactly zero impact or entertainment value.

After a very brief, derivative and clumsy justification for heading back to the swamp involving a young woman named Mary-Beth (Danielle Harris) looking for her family with a kooky sightseeing operator named Reverend Zombie (Tony Todd) back into Crowley's territory we go, along with fresh meat in the form of hired muscle being paid $500 per head, with a bonus to the guy who takes down Crowley.

Only as we see quite frequently in the latter half of the film, Crowley is not an easybeat, at near 7 foot, with a mangled face, huge guns and the ability to take a shotgun blast to the chest without wincing, it would have taken a lot more than five hundred clams to get me in the same state – let alone the same dark and gloomy swamp.

Victor is unstoppable, he is everywhere and can seemingly get anywhere instantaneously. He also has a bunch of toys that he utilises to disembowel, eviscerate, decapitate, violate and penetrate victims that number into the double digits.

No problem there of course this is a psycho killer flick. The problem is the lack of creativity used: victims inch about nervously, do the "did you hear that?" and stand awaiting their violent demise. There are no traps, no clever sleight of hand or tricks, Victor shows up in plain view – shows them his weapon du jour and uses it on them.

If it's a hatchet he hatchets them, a chainsaw? Saw 'em in half. A sander? Hello abrasions. The victims don't even fight back 90% of the time, they stand still and take their medicine like guys in a bad kung fu movie.

What makes that even worse is that I g

Fmovies: I saw "Hatchet 2" last night at the Fantsay Film Fest in Frankfurt, Germany and what I saw was just WOOOOW! I loved "Hatchet"...and this sequel is much better than the first one. "Hatchet 2" is funny and very, very violent. Now I know why it should be cut from the MPAA to get an R-rating. I think it's a good idea to release movies without any rating instead of cutting something out like other studios do because they want to make more profit. In "Hatchet 2" there are many kills on screen and they are very violent, very bloody & gory. One of them might be one of the funniest and most curious kills ever - the whole audience laughed and acclaimed loudly.

I enjoyed this movie all the time and I hope to see it again - uncut again!

Hatchet II finds itself starting literally where the previous one left off. However, very noticeable changes are all too apparent in nearly every aspect of the movie, besides the outrageous gore. Marybeth has been recast and while I like Danielle Harris, I have to agree with others on saying it took basically the whole movie to figure out the character. When a character get's recast, the actor is likely not going to play them the same way and Harris' performance was different than Feldman's. Marybeth also seemed different from the previous movie since she was a strong female character, but is now more of a crybaby who needs men to save her. The change in Crowley's makeup is also clearly different and it was not as good. Now before you go all crazy and get upset at me, take a look at my Hatchet review, I enjoyed that movie a great deal. The first movie was humorous, did not take itself too serious and had characters that while stereotypical for a horror movie, you cared about most of them. Unfortunately, this sequel does not hold up to the original and it's a real shame considering I wanted to like this one just as much. Now, I don't hate it at all, but I just don't feel that it was a good movie, let alone a sequel. I am disappointed with Adam Green because he did such a good job with Hatchet and Frozen, yet this movie feels rushed and cheaply done. There is not as much humor in this one, unless you want to count the gore that is pretty ridiculous. I think where the first movie was something made just for the people who love those corny 80's slashers; this sequel is more for people who enjoy non-stop vicious gore. Don't get me wrong, it's not all the gore that makes this movie a bad second installment. It's the fact that they seemed to think up a dozen disgusting murders and build a movie around it. You pretty much hate or don't know most of the characters in this movie, so when their time comes, it doesn't matter. There is even a montage of flashbacks that shows several other people who were victims of Victor Crowley and they all suffer grotesque deaths.

The whole set up of the sequel is also a bit far-fetched. Marybeth's entire world has just been flipped upside down and she was nearly ripped to pieces by a deranged ghost-creature, yet she is willing to risk her life to go back to find him. I also find it strange that so many locals who know about the cursed swamps would actually go there all in the hopes that a well-known con-artist will pay them each $5,000. Green should have just kept Marybeth in the swamp and had a group of campers or tourists stumble onto her. I'm on the fence with the fact that they added an origin story to Victor Crowley and gave a reason for why Marybeth is connected to him. Most horror movies that try to go back and give an origin story for the villain usually end up being pretty bad, just look at Halloween 6. I wouldn't say it was a total fail because it was slightly interesting and for some reason it reminded me a little of Pumpkinhead. Some cameos you will undoubtedly notice are Mercedes McNab, Joleigh Fioravanti and Joel Murray (though it's only his voice). For anyone who saw Adam Green's other movie, Frozen, you might notice an Easter egg involving Emma Bell. If you haven't seen Frozen yet then I suggest you do that, great thriller. Shawn Ashmore and Joe Lynch also have some small cameos, so keep an eye out or you might miss them.

I guess Hatchet II could have been worse, though it's definitely not memorabl

Hatchet II fmovies. I'd say the first half of Hatchet 2 is a bit sillier and even campier than the first, but the films last half-hour really makes up for it.

THis is one seriously gory flick. It's gorier than the original, and funnier than the original. It might actually be better than the original, but it's an awfully tight race.

Adam Green still has me on the edge of my seat waiting for his next horror project. Guess I'll have to wait for the DVD release of Hatchet 3 next month - even though he didn't direct.

Hatchet 2 is a little better than the original on the acting/cast front as well. In the original we see a bunch of undeveloped boobs getting knocked-off left and right. Here, there's a little more substance to who's getting their heads ripped off.

This thing gets pretty intense down the stretch. Thumbs up.

There wasn't much difference between this sequel and the first movie. Pretty much the exact same thing happens. This time the girl, Mary Beth, whom survived the first night is back to return to the swamp with Rev Zombie's help for a really stupid reason: to bring back the bodies of her family. So Zombie gathers a crew and they go to the swamp that night. Zombie has a plan to put an end to Crowley's ghost.

Do plans ever work with freaky killers-No! So you get more blood and gore and skulls bashed in, plus some faces cut off.

FINAL VERDICT: If you never have your fill of slasher films, check it out.

Adam Green gets it. Horror movies are fun. Hatchet 2 may be the funnest horror movie of them all, and to it's slight detriment, the film has so much fun, that we forget that people are being viciously murdered. Once again, Green populates the slasher film with a bevy of extremely likable fodder for Hodder. Hatchet nods in the general direction of it's forefathers, the horror franchises of the eighties, before it takes a belt-sander to what is expected from a slasher film. It is a greatest kills marathon, full of kills you have never seen before. The story expands upon and strengthens the first film and leaves you wanting oh so much more Victor Crowley. No CGI gore. No excruciating torture scenes, just lots and lots of body rippin' and mutalatin'. Go see it, but try and come out with all your pieces.