Embrace of the Vampire (1995)

Ok. If the only reason yer interested in seeing this phoney-baloney Vampire claptrap is to ogle Alyssa Milano, the nubile tv cutie from "Who'se the Boss", and moore recently, "Charmed", then yer in luck. Because she does git nekkid, quite a lot actually. Does it add anything to the film? Yes again, since the rest of the film is a big, fat ZERO. :=8P

Well. There's this annoying no-named guy who used to be human(Martin Kemp,"EastEnders" tv show) , until 3 bare-breasted bimbos snack on him while he was sleeping outdoors in the forest on a rock. Now he's a greasy vampire, and decides to fixate on Alyssa Milano, blabbering about how he is "her destiny", even though he is a hundred years older than her, and they've never met. He puts the whammy on her, which consists of him whining and obsessing endlessly about her from afar, and throwing his voice so that Alyssa can hear him whine. In an obvious plot device, no-name vamp guy says he has to "have her" in 3 days or go to sleep. The audience does not get the benefit of waiting 3 days. Alyssa is the "prudish virgin" on a campus loaded with jerks, sluts, and date rapists - a real American college! She has a bland boyfriend who insists that he needs sex from her NOW, but he's the only semi-nice human in the area. Charlotte Lewis("The Golden Child") is there as well, playing a slutty, sleazy, lesbian photographer who feels up Alyssa in the 1st 5 minutes that they meet. Annoyed that others desire Alyssa's bod, no-name vamp guy starts to chew up all of Alyssa's semi-friends, until they're all dead apart from the bland-boy. In the end, Alyssa becomes a tramp, no-name vamp guy goes to sleep, bland boy gets zapped by some blue vampire lightning (I'm not making this up...), and everyone else is dead. Director Anne Goursaud has made similar piffle before ("Poison Ivy 2", "8 1/2 Weeks 2"), only not as obnoxiously pretentious. The MooCow says sher, ya git yer shirtless Alyssa Milano quota, but the price you pay is a bland, silly, cowtrived film that is about as exciting to watch as foot fungus. If yer willing to pay the price, then maybe this "Embrace" is fer you; udderwise, stick with Alyssa's Celebrity Skin pictures. :=8P

Fmovies: Great to see Alyssa naked, (for the guys) but Bad in every other respect. I can't believe that the director wasn't sued for intellectual property theft, as she edited Bram stoker's dracula a couple years earlier, and let's just say "borrowed" dialogue and shots and camera techniques. A sorry pitiful waste of time, rent this dreck if you're in need of a non-prescription sleep aid. 2/10 ( I save 1's for total losses)

What has happened to vampire movies in the last twenty years? This is a dreadful movie that belongs in that nameless back room in the back of the local video store. Not that I'm complaining,I think Alyssa Milano is a great actress with an incredible figure, but I think she only took this movie to prove she is not a little girl anymore, as if anyone remembers that she was the daughter on "Who's The Boss." Around the same time as this picture, she also did a similar role as a succubus on an episode of the "Outer Limits" who also seemed to get off on nudity. This movie may not be pure pornography, but the soft porn in it seems to be the only reason guys and frat houses are renting it from video shelves.The vampire story in this takes third stage as Alyssa seems to shed her clothes every ten to twenty minutes. Hello, where's the vampire? He is supposed to be the star of the picture, but we only get to see him whenever he's complaining or grousing that he can't bite Alyssa. Dracula, Lestat or Barnabus Collins could knock the stuffing out of him and not think twice about it. I can't believe a woman created this; I would have at least liked to have seen this movie about Alyssa playing a vampire haunting a college who shed her all black clothing before seducing and then killing her own victims, at least that's the way I would like to go (I know that sounds tasteless, but I've seen fair movies out of tasteless ideas). Rachel True from "The Craft" also stars in this farce in a nearly forgotten role, but then, why would she want to remember doing this ?

Embrace of the Vampire fmovies. ...I found this quite dull. First, there's barely a story - much of the movie is devoted to sex scenes that stop the story completely, and have no real significance in altering the "evolving" plot.

So if there's a lot of sex, there must be some merit, right? Actually, I found the sex and nude scenes flatly directed - despite the flesh and activity shown, surprisingly a lot of these scenes have nothing erotic to them.

We don't learn a lot about the characters. For instance, why does the vampire character only have a certain time to live? How did he get to where he is in the movie? How did he find the heroine? And so on. None of this is explained. And speaking of the characters, none aroused any sympathy - in fact, all of them seemed annoying.

And though the movie is supposed to be about vampires, there's hardly any vampire action!

Yes, You-Know-Who gets naked enough, but that's not enough to save this movie, or even make it worth fast-forwarding.

Alyssa Milano's breasts give a terrific performance here. They play, they dance, they utter soliloquies, they defy gravity (actually not really), and they photograph well.

The dominant presence of Milano's breasts prevent the vampire story from taking root. But all is well, for we need nothing more than the incredible anticipation of seeing the breasts in another well lit shot.

Life is indeed complete because director Goursaud has committed Alyssa's ample amples to the screen in such worthy style. Salancha senorita Anne, and the sangria's on me....

Okay I am a huge vampire film fan. I saw this movie and I laughed! Alyssa Milano plays Charlotte, a young virgin fresh out of a convent and entering college. She has a handsome and sweet boyfriend named Chris who is willing to wait till she is ready but even he has his sexual frustrations. Charlotte becomes the target and object of a nameless Vampire's desires (played by The Krays Martin Kemp). The Vampire is dying or in threat of being put in a deep sleep unless he takes the blood of a virgin, but not just any virgin: the reincarnation of the virgin woman he once loved before he became a vampire. The idea is for the Vampire to seduce Charlotte and "put doupt in her heart" against her faithful but sexually frustrated Chris so that she will willingly surrenders herself to the Vampire. The Vampire does this through dreams and hypno spells and he also puts a voodoo out on Chris who also dreams that tell him that Charlotte is in danger. Then the film follows a series of pseudo-sensual, soft porn seduction scenes and campy horror scenes. The film is classic Alyssa Milano: she is incredible to look at! She is sensual and brave enough to bare her breasts before the camera on more than one scene. I hated at how over exaggerated and poorly written this film was. The Vampire seduction scenes are good, but after awhile he gets so boring and so repetitive. So if you like soft-core porn, vampire, horror, B- films: this is the movie for you otherwise this is a comedy!