Nine Months (1995)

The producer should have been given nine months with no time off for good

behaviour for this most unfunny film. The Praying Mantis should have eaten Grant, adapted Woody Allen's voice,

claimed to be the father, married Moore and devoured the child factory. We would have had a funnier film. Another Grant film where the soundtrack was the only redeeming feature.

Fmovies: "Nine Months" is a chick flick romcom about a happily unmarried couple (Moore & Grant) who gets preggo and, well, has a baby. A big step down for kid flick director Chris Columbus, this tumble from messy to sappy to corny to slapsticky wouldn't be worth the time if it weren't for the comic contributions of Arnold, Williams, Cusack, and Goldblum. Moore (Shoulda been Sophie Marceau) seems uncomfortably out of place while Grant hams it up dutifully (stiff upper lip and all that) as the film becomes increasingly in need of creative substance slogging its way toward its sentimental conclusion. No brainer fluff stuff for young female sofa spuds. (C+)

Hugh Grant is pretty 'watchable' in most films he does. His on-screen presence is pretty much consists of witty lines, snappy articulation and boyish / non-threatening charm - and some element of nerves.

He's got that same appeal in this movie - and with the over-the-top acting of Tom Arnold, the film has great comedic performances. Still though, it lacks a compelling story.

The simple storyline never got interesting: an unmarried couple discovers they have a baby on the way. The soon-to-be father (Grant) seems uncomfortable with idea of becoming a responsible husband and father - leading to problems with the mother (Julianne Moore). Being in presence of a reckless family (headed by Arnold) just seems to make things worst ... and the story progresses from there.

If you're a Grant fan, you'll enjoy his part in the movie. However, get ready to also discover that it isn't enough to save this movie. It's just not that fun to watch.

Nine Months fmovies. "Nine Months" is a predictable chick flick, where a very happy, content bachelor knocks up his live-in girlfriend, thereby turning his world upside-down. Lessons learned: men who don't want to marry and have children are portrayed as immature, self-absorbed, selfish, and misguided. Carting lots of screaming kids around in a minivan is, apparently, the most fun a man can have in this lifetime. For women, having children is the ultimate achievement and fulfillment of their lives. This is an insulting fairy tale that women will love, because it shows men who don't want marriage and kids as BAD and men who do want marriage and kids as GOOD. Women are always GOOD no matter what their attitude or actions are.

I had heard this flick was pretty bad from the 'real' movie critics, and it even got panned on the Simpsons, so I knew I was in for it when my grandmother saw it starting on TV and proclaimed that she MUST see it. Apparently, she heard that it was a classic. She heard wrong. Now I did not see the entire movie, but about 45 minutes of it. This may make my review invalid in some people's eyes, but trust me, Nine Months could not possibly have saved itself. When you've been watching a comedy for over half an hour and have not laughed once, then it is safe to say that chuckle won't come. The jokes were either childish or outdated, like the running mantis gag (please) or Tom Arnold scolding his kids to stop eating someone else's food while he himself is stuffing his face with crackers (har har). And, I swear, do we really need to see "Let's Get It On" in another movie sex scene? I don't know how many times I've seen this excuse for comedy lately. They even used it in Austin Powers 2, so you'd think other movies would take a hint! To conclude, Hugh Grant is a skinny, pasty Brit with bad teeth and Tom Arnold used to be married to Roseanne. Yeah, two great leading men ladies and gentlemen. And if Hugh's character doesn't want to have kids, I don't blame him. We never see any children in this thing who actually act polite or nice, except from afar. Yeah, that's a mature way to decide you want a baby. Ah, look honey, that baby fifteen feet away is making a sand castle. PLANT YOUR SEED NOW! Never mind the fact that a baby costs MONEY, and it CRIES, no no. Since I did not see the entire thing, let's just leave this review without a score. Does that make everyone happy? Okay, great.

A child psychiatrist's (Hugh Grant) life is turned upside down when his girlfriend (Julianne Moore) becomes pregnant. Grant acts more childish than the brats he sees as his fears make him do the stupidest things. Also along for the ride are Russian doctor Robin Williams, struggling artist Jeff Goldblum and an odd married couple (Tom Arnold and Joan Cusack). The film is more of a slap-stick comedy than a cinematic creation. Grant, who was in the midst of being caught in Hollywood with a prostitute just before this film was released, ended up having the last laugh as the movie ended up being a mild box office success. That does not change the fact that the production is a pretty big mess from top to bottom. "Nine Months" goes for laughs and gets deflated very quickly. The little drama pinched in feels forced and never does become apparent. 2 stars out of 5.