Mean Machine (2001)

I have watched this movie 3 times and every time I enjoyed it even better. I am totally bored off the American accent of the Hollywood films. Different British accents in this movie removed the rust from my ears. Two commentators were the best I've ever heard. Monk was the most colorful character in the movie, although was given a limited role. I prefer European movies to US movies most of the time. In US movies a hero saves the world, the nation, the city or the whole universe. They spent lots of money on special effects, the artificial scenes, costumes, etc. But those films lack something that I found it difficult to explain in English. Despite their limited budget, European movies like "Mean Machine" manage to affect the audience emotionally and have a better recallability ratio.

Fmovies: Now see I loved Snatch. I loved Lock Stock thats me so yet again for sure i loved this. Vinnie Jones as usual is not the most convincing but his presence is felt from the outset. Danny Dyer "Tommy Johnson" The football factory provided some very funny moments showing his status as not just a swearing buffoon of British acting. The match drags on and the commentary during the game is unbelievably childish and the match would have been a lot better without it. Also I cant see how they can portray all of the prison staff as racist low lives that beat cheat and steal.Oh an who can forget Massive.... It's Ironic! I cant see a sequel or any of that nonsense but one of the better British films of the past few years.

Danny Meehan(Vinnie Jones), a former captain of the English national football team who was banned from football for life for fixing a match between England and Germany, is sentenced to three years in Longmarsh prison for assaulting two police officers after a lengthy drinking session and driving wildly to a local bar, whilst in prison he gets asked to coach the guards but refuses. Meehan (Jones) then goes on to make a team of convicts, with half the people in Longmarsh not liking him it wont be an easy task.

This film is very good; it involves violence & humour at the same time. It's not for younger viewers due to the language & violence involved in some scenes. I like this film because of its story line & casting.

I would give the film 4 stars out of 5.

Mean Machine fmovies. As a fan of the original Burt Reynolds movie, I had mixed feelings about this movie. On one side as a traditional football (soccer) fan and not a fan of American football, I though I'd get more enjoyment out of it. On the other side I love the original movie so much it would obviously suffer in comparison, and let's be honest Vinnie Jones is no Burt Reynolds.

Plot In A Paragraph: A disgraced former footballer is sent to jail for three years for drunkenly assaulting a police officer. Once there the Warden wants him to train the guards football team, he refuses, after a while he agrees to play in, and coach a team of cons to play the gaurds in a one off match.

Whilst not as enjoyable as the Burt Reynolds version, it is a lot of fun with Jason Statham stealing the show as The Monk!! While Danny Dyer gets a lot of laughs, likewise Vas Blackwood as Massive and David Kelly is touching as Doc.

This film is about a disgraced national football coach who gets imprisoned for assault. He coaches the prison football team to play against the guards.

While watching the first half of the film, I was so sure that I would not enjoy it. All the roughness and senseless violence put me off completely. However, as soon as the football match kicks in, I was amazed by the way it lifts my spirits. The match occupies 30 minute screen time, but there is not a second of boredom. Instead, it is so mightily engaging and thoroughly intense. It felt as if I was there to experience the match, and just like everyone, I was hoping for the ultimate pride that would last forever. I am truly impressed by the incredible story telling of "Mean Machine".

I really enjoyed this flick. Perhaps because I always enjoy sports related flicks, or because I am a huge fan of Vinnie Jones, thanks to Guy Richie, or maybe because I am in love with Jason Statham, also thanks to Guy.

But why I watched it in the first place was because I had always enjoyed The Longest Yard with Burt Reynolds, in fact the only flick of his I enjoyed, and was very happy to see a British version of the football classic. I loved the characters, the seamless transition from American football to European football, and the accents. Vinnie Jones gives yet another great performance, and it was nice to see so many characters return from Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels as well as Snatch (great flicks!).

I give this flick 4 1/2 stars, only because it didn't showcase "Monk" enough for my tastes.